[ Brown Blog ]
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Saturday, February 28, 2004 4:41 PM
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Saturday, February 28, 2004 4:41 PM
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Good afternoon. It is Saturday and I've got nothing to do. It is the first time in quite a while and I'm totally stoked! I finished my project at work and have a short break before I start on the next one. I went to the symphony on Thursday. It was amazing. There is something very warm and wonderful about sinking into the theatre seat and letting the music of a well tuned orchestra sweep around you. It's a good feeling. They played Beethoven's 8th symphony and it was perfect. I've never been a fan of classical music. I think this is because I'm a writer and most of my music (solo acoustic/singer/songwriter) is completely focused on the words and storytelling. This is good on one level, because a lot of people can relate to the words/stories and there is great camaraderie/relationship/connection in that moment of communication. However, lately hearing the wondrous sound of the Tulsa Signature Symphony I've started appreciating music that is without words. It gives you the chance to connect/feel/relate on a very personal level, and it is a story that is only applicable to you. We all compose thoughts and assign feelings as the music flows through us. The physical aspect of music is universal and classical styles bring out that point nicely. It transcends language, age, and gender and cuts straight to the essence of human emotion. Fantastic! My thanks to the TCC Signature Symphony for an outstanding performance.
See ya,
jb
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Friday, February 27, 2004 3:19 PM
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Friday, February 27, 2004 3:19 PM
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Free at Last! Free at Last! Thank God Almighty, I'm Free at Last!
This is my newest piece of art.
I call it "Say NO to Sprint!"
My life just got a whole lot better.
This is my newest piece of art.
I call it "Say NO to Sprint!"
My life just got a whole lot better.
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Wednesday, February 25, 2004 1:02 PM
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Wednesday, February 25, 2004 1:02 PM
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Hi Everyone. I'm in the office and knocking out this project. A couple of projects actually. Staining the woodworks with my dad at my parents house and this engineering epa compliance thing with Guardian Energy. Both have been educational and a bit more than I expected them to be, but there is always great satisfaction in doing a good job and getting things finished. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel and am glad.
No major patterns of thought today, just working hard and keeping it together (which had been a full-time gig for me lately). I'll catch you later, but first I wanted to leave you with a pic from my new photo gallery.
This is a great picture of my friend Missy Cox in Oxford where she earned a Masters degree in Economic History.
Have a great day!
-jb
No major patterns of thought today, just working hard and keeping it together (which had been a full-time gig for me lately). I'll catch you later, but first I wanted to leave you with a pic from my new photo gallery.
This is a great picture of my friend Missy Cox in Oxford where she earned a Masters degree in Economic History.
Have a great day!
-jb
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Tuesday, February 24, 2004 10:34 AM
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Tuesday, February 24, 2004 10:34 AM
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This is a photo of a mosaic of the crucifixion of Christ that I took when I was in Jerusalem's Old City. It is displayed in the Church of the Holy Suplica which is built on and around the place that most believe to be the location of the Cross. It's huge, about 8'x15' and beautiful with many vivid colors. It was a neat experience to get to go there.
Luke 16:1:13KJV
1 And he said also unto his disciples, There was a certain rich man, which had a steward; and the same was accused unto him that he had wasted his goods.
2 And he called him, and said unto him, How is it that I hear this of thee? give an account of thy stewardship; for thou mayest be no longer steward.
3 Then the steward said within himself, What shall I do? for my lord taketh away from me the stewardship: I cannot dig; to beg I am ashamed.
4 I am resolved what to do, that, when I am put out of the stewardship, they may receive me into their houses.
5 So he called every one of his lord's debtors unto him, and said unto the first, How much owest thou unto my lord?
6 And he said, An hundred measures of oil. And he said unto him, Take thy bill, and sit down quickly, and write fifty.
7 Then said he to another, And how much owest thou? And he said, An hundred measures of wheat. And he said unto him, Take thy bill, and write fourscore.
8 And the lord commended the unjust steward, because he had done wisely: for the children of this world are in their generation wiser than the children of light.
9 And I say unto you, Make to yourselves friends of the mammon of unrighteousness; that, when ye fail, they may receive you into everlasting habitations.
10 He that is faithful in that which is least is faithful also in much: and he that is unjust in the least is unjust also in much.
11 If therefore ye have not been faithful in the unrighteous mammon, who will commit to your trust the true riches?
12 And if ye have not been faithful in that which is another man's, who shall give you that which is your own?
13 No servant can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.
-Luke 16:1-13 KJV
I've been hovering over this issue for a while (being a good steward). This is a further Biblical explanation of that point. We've got to first stop a look at ourselves. We have to stop looking toward the future for everything we are wanting for our flesh (Lexus, big house, financial security, love, etc..). We need to actually see what God had given us and consider what our world would be like if we didn't have those things (health, shelter, food, clean water, loving families, etc...). In this a deep sense of thankfulness should arise within our hearts and an overwhelming sense of righteous perspective should follow. In this state of mind/soul/heart which should be signified by peace, joy, and praise to the Father we should begin to take on the mindset of a Good Steward. Taking precious care of the relationships/body/money/things that He has give us. I need help with this everyday!
I heard Lester Sumrall teach on the rest of this chapter (Luke 16:19-31) earlier and it was a bit sobering. In a world that believes in "relative" truth and "I'm a good person, I'm going to heaven", this is a clear pictation of eternal separation from God, and the deafness of peoples' ears to hear the truth. It's worth a read if you have the time.
Take care and have a great day.
-jb
Luke 16:1:13KJV
1 And he said also unto his disciples, There was a certain rich man, which had a steward; and the same was accused unto him that he had wasted his goods.
2 And he called him, and said unto him, How is it that I hear this of thee? give an account of thy stewardship; for thou mayest be no longer steward.
3 Then the steward said within himself, What shall I do? for my lord taketh away from me the stewardship: I cannot dig; to beg I am ashamed.
4 I am resolved what to do, that, when I am put out of the stewardship, they may receive me into their houses.
5 So he called every one of his lord's debtors unto him, and said unto the first, How much owest thou unto my lord?
6 And he said, An hundred measures of oil. And he said unto him, Take thy bill, and sit down quickly, and write fifty.
7 Then said he to another, And how much owest thou? And he said, An hundred measures of wheat. And he said unto him, Take thy bill, and write fourscore.
8 And the lord commended the unjust steward, because he had done wisely: for the children of this world are in their generation wiser than the children of light.
9 And I say unto you, Make to yourselves friends of the mammon of unrighteousness; that, when ye fail, they may receive you into everlasting habitations.
10 He that is faithful in that which is least is faithful also in much: and he that is unjust in the least is unjust also in much.
11 If therefore ye have not been faithful in the unrighteous mammon, who will commit to your trust the true riches?
12 And if ye have not been faithful in that which is another man's, who shall give you that which is your own?
13 No servant can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.
-Luke 16:1-13 KJV
I've been hovering over this issue for a while (being a good steward). This is a further Biblical explanation of that point. We've got to first stop a look at ourselves. We have to stop looking toward the future for everything we are wanting for our flesh (Lexus, big house, financial security, love, etc..). We need to actually see what God had given us and consider what our world would be like if we didn't have those things (health, shelter, food, clean water, loving families, etc...). In this a deep sense of thankfulness should arise within our hearts and an overwhelming sense of righteous perspective should follow. In this state of mind/soul/heart which should be signified by peace, joy, and praise to the Father we should begin to take on the mindset of a Good Steward. Taking precious care of the relationships/body/money/things that He has give us. I need help with this everyday!
I heard Lester Sumrall teach on the rest of this chapter (Luke 16:19-31) earlier and it was a bit sobering. In a world that believes in "relative" truth and "I'm a good person, I'm going to heaven", this is a clear pictation of eternal separation from God, and the deafness of peoples' ears to hear the truth. It's worth a read if you have the time.
Take care and have a great day.
-jb
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Monday, February 23, 2004 2:25 PM
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Monday, February 23, 2004 2:25 PM
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WOW! This Blew my sox off this morning! This comes from our youth intern at the church, Nathan Griffis. His blog is www.xanga.com/spaceboy2020
First he give a scripture quote:
It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, to prepare God's people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.
Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.
-Ephesians 4:11-16
How do you know what is true and what is not? A couple of months ago, on the way to Red River, New Mexico, I was reading a book called Genius in Their Own Words: The Intellectual Journeys of Seven Great 20Th-Century Thinkers. It's a collection of works by some of the "greatest thinkers" in the past hundred or so years. My main reason for checking out the book was to read the section on Einstein. I wanted to know what this genius of a man thought about the world, not just about physics; I wanted to know his philosophy and possibly find some truth in his words. Of course I can't even remember anything I read about Einstein now. The only thing I can remember is the section about Bertrand Russell. I was startled by the amount of truth that I found in Russell's words. But of course, the truth wasn't coming through his words or thoughts...the truth was being shown to me by his lack of truth. Russell gives a little bit of history about himself starting from when he decided to turn away from his grandmother's beliefs to his adventures in the search for truth. Now I can't remember if that's exactly what he was searching for...but I assume that's what he was doing.
Throughout his autobiography he tells about how he believed in "so and so" philosophy for some time, but then seeing the errors in his ways, he would quickly change to another philosophy. It seemed like he would find a "way" that fit for a while--maybe it was the "popular" way at the time--but then something would change his mind. There was never any foundation for his beliefs. If the right person came along they could easily change his thinking with the right words. I think he best sums it up when he says, "I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong." Obviously he knows that his beliefs are not true. Don't you think that truth would be something worth dying for? There has to be a foundation and it has to be built upon stone. It has to be solid and without exception. Most of all it has to be TRUE. How can you live your life being "blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming"? That is truth. We see it every day. You can put it to the test and it will always be true. We lose sight of what is right when we decide to indulge in any kind of doctrine that only sounds good.
I guess it's just very easy to get wrapped up in things that are pleasurable to the body and mind. I've always loved theoretical physics and basically anything to do with math. But there is nothing in those. It took me quite a while to realize that. So what if I figured out a unified theory that could unite all the forces in the universe...that can't help me get along with my neighbor. A million dollars can't buy me happiness. These are things we all know...but for some reason it just doesn't sink in with some people. I watch some of the youth at my church as they nod their heads in understanding after listening to Jason teach from the bible, but yet they walk away and continue to do the opposite of what they just claimed to understand. The only conclusion that I can come to is that they just don't fully believe it. Just like Russell, I doubt that they would die for what little belief they may have. And hopefully unlike Russell, they will not turn away from truth. I've been going to the same church for ten years and it's only been within the last year that I actually understand. It's all because I had never taken the time to read the Word. The bible says that faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word. So faith is not something that can be bought. It's something that must be sought after. It is belief in everything that you do. It's loving GOD above all and loving your neighbor as YOURSELF. You have to believe the words that come out of your mouth. If you can't believe, then you can't have faith and you're only fooling yourself to think that you do, and if your belief is not based on truth, then it is vain. It would be better to die for nothing than to die for something that is not true, but how much greater would it be to die for truth!
-Nathan Griffis
First he give a scripture quote:
It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, to prepare God's people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.
Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.
-Ephesians 4:11-16
How do you know what is true and what is not? A couple of months ago, on the way to Red River, New Mexico, I was reading a book called Genius in Their Own Words: The Intellectual Journeys of Seven Great 20Th-Century Thinkers. It's a collection of works by some of the "greatest thinkers" in the past hundred or so years. My main reason for checking out the book was to read the section on Einstein. I wanted to know what this genius of a man thought about the world, not just about physics; I wanted to know his philosophy and possibly find some truth in his words. Of course I can't even remember anything I read about Einstein now. The only thing I can remember is the section about Bertrand Russell. I was startled by the amount of truth that I found in Russell's words. But of course, the truth wasn't coming through his words or thoughts...the truth was being shown to me by his lack of truth. Russell gives a little bit of history about himself starting from when he decided to turn away from his grandmother's beliefs to his adventures in the search for truth. Now I can't remember if that's exactly what he was searching for...but I assume that's what he was doing.
Throughout his autobiography he tells about how he believed in "so and so" philosophy for some time, but then seeing the errors in his ways, he would quickly change to another philosophy. It seemed like he would find a "way" that fit for a while--maybe it was the "popular" way at the time--but then something would change his mind. There was never any foundation for his beliefs. If the right person came along they could easily change his thinking with the right words. I think he best sums it up when he says, "I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong." Obviously he knows that his beliefs are not true. Don't you think that truth would be something worth dying for? There has to be a foundation and it has to be built upon stone. It has to be solid and without exception. Most of all it has to be TRUE. How can you live your life being "blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming"? That is truth. We see it every day. You can put it to the test and it will always be true. We lose sight of what is right when we decide to indulge in any kind of doctrine that only sounds good.
I guess it's just very easy to get wrapped up in things that are pleasurable to the body and mind. I've always loved theoretical physics and basically anything to do with math. But there is nothing in those. It took me quite a while to realize that. So what if I figured out a unified theory that could unite all the forces in the universe...that can't help me get along with my neighbor. A million dollars can't buy me happiness. These are things we all know...but for some reason it just doesn't sink in with some people. I watch some of the youth at my church as they nod their heads in understanding after listening to Jason teach from the bible, but yet they walk away and continue to do the opposite of what they just claimed to understand. The only conclusion that I can come to is that they just don't fully believe it. Just like Russell, I doubt that they would die for what little belief they may have. And hopefully unlike Russell, they will not turn away from truth. I've been going to the same church for ten years and it's only been within the last year that I actually understand. It's all because I had never taken the time to read the Word. The bible says that faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word. So faith is not something that can be bought. It's something that must be sought after. It is belief in everything that you do. It's loving GOD above all and loving your neighbor as YOURSELF. You have to believe the words that come out of your mouth. If you can't believe, then you can't have faith and you're only fooling yourself to think that you do, and if your belief is not based on truth, then it is vain. It would be better to die for nothing than to die for something that is not true, but how much greater would it be to die for truth!
-Nathan Griffis
Hi. It is Monday morning and raining here in green country. I absolutely love the spring rain. I'm calling it spring because I'm hoping that's what it is. It certainly has felt like it the past few days. This weekend was pure Glory!
I've been getting up early lately and getting a little exercise, which enables me (for the first time in quite a while) to catch the sunrise and newday. I love it! There is a smell in the air that signifies spring. Can't really describe it, but it is unmistakable. Is fall or spring better? It seems like I always pick spring in the spring and fall in the fall. Who knows?
This website thing is getting out of control. Thad Andrews (my bro from the University of Tulsa) is getting some mad skills at this web design / flash animation stuff. I'm sure that he'd like to hear from you if you like what he's done at jasonbrown.org and provencemusic.com . His email is me@thadandrews.com. Drop him a line if you get a chance.
I've been more busy lately than I've been in I can't remember when, but I'm feeling great and getting it all done. Having to get up a little earlier, but that is great too. Because of the exercise, I have more energy with less sleep. Pretty Great!
I took the FPC kids to tour this gigantic new church that they've built in Tulsa called Asbury United Methodist. My dad (Johnny Mack Brown) worked on this thing for almost a year running hot and cold water lines, the 12" air piping that feeds the HUGE organ pipes, and installing the air handlers. It was a big job. This church sets on 36 acres, cost a cool $40 million, and was managed by a guy (Eric Miller) who goes to our church. So we got to take a insiders tour. So we're touring this monstrosity of a building, enter the cathedral (which was filled with organ music because the organ had just been tuned) and up walks the sound engineer. He's holding a laptop computer and tells us that he can control the sound board from it via wireless remote. WOW! Then he precedes to demonstrate. First he launches the DVD to Shrek onto two large rear projection screens, and starts to crank up the sound. Only the sound he was turning up was not the movie.... IT WAS MY RECORD!!!! I was like... wait a tick... I know that song! Eric had given him a copy of my album, and it was a total surprise to me. He turned it up loud and it was AWESOME! I couldn't believe it. Here was this giant new sanctuary filled with my little music being pushed by 1.21 Gigawatts!!!! Eric said that one of the bass speaker cabinets was 8'X8'. And I said, yeah I saw that speaker in Back to the Future when Michael J. Fox thought he was a rock star and then blew himself across the room! What a moment.
Then we went to Zio's for Italian food. Good, cheap, and lots of it. After we were stuffed with food I took them to the ice skating rink. At which they started complaining of sore feet and ankles only ten minutes into the hour session. I can't razz the too hard because I didn't even skate (the last time I went ice skating I pulled one of those gross football replay moments where the guy goes one way and his knee/ankle go another... and the tv station keeps showing it over and over....anyway, I wasn't getting back on the ice) but still 10 minutes! Come on, they're in high school and made out of rubber still. They ought to be able bounce around the ice even if they can't skate. We had fun a lot of fun.
But wait, there's more. We went to a coffee shop to see my friends (Chad, Becky, and James) who are in this band called Given (I'd give you there website, but they don't have one). Well it was a bust because the coffee house double booked some other guy for the same night. Well, we went home in defeat thinking that we weren't going to get our music fill for the evening. When we got back to the church the guys started playing in our worship room. LSS, An hour later we had two new songs that are unbelievable. What does this mean?! What are we going to do with all these awesome songs. We'll see.
That's it for today. I hope all is well and write me when you get a chance.
Thanks,
jb
PS. And for you non-junior-high note writers LSS=Long Story Short.
I've been getting up early lately and getting a little exercise, which enables me (for the first time in quite a while) to catch the sunrise and newday. I love it! There is a smell in the air that signifies spring. Can't really describe it, but it is unmistakable. Is fall or spring better? It seems like I always pick spring in the spring and fall in the fall. Who knows?
This website thing is getting out of control. Thad Andrews (my bro from the University of Tulsa) is getting some mad skills at this web design / flash animation stuff. I'm sure that he'd like to hear from you if you like what he's done at jasonbrown.org and provencemusic.com . His email is me@thadandrews.com. Drop him a line if you get a chance.
I've been more busy lately than I've been in I can't remember when, but I'm feeling great and getting it all done. Having to get up a little earlier, but that is great too. Because of the exercise, I have more energy with less sleep. Pretty Great!
I took the FPC kids to tour this gigantic new church that they've built in Tulsa called Asbury United Methodist. My dad (Johnny Mack Brown) worked on this thing for almost a year running hot and cold water lines, the 12" air piping that feeds the HUGE organ pipes, and installing the air handlers. It was a big job. This church sets on 36 acres, cost a cool $40 million, and was managed by a guy (Eric Miller) who goes to our church. So we got to take a insiders tour. So we're touring this monstrosity of a building, enter the cathedral (which was filled with organ music because the organ had just been tuned) and up walks the sound engineer. He's holding a laptop computer and tells us that he can control the sound board from it via wireless remote. WOW! Then he precedes to demonstrate. First he launches the DVD to Shrek onto two large rear projection screens, and starts to crank up the sound. Only the sound he was turning up was not the movie.... IT WAS MY RECORD!!!! I was like... wait a tick... I know that song! Eric had given him a copy of my album, and it was a total surprise to me. He turned it up loud and it was AWESOME! I couldn't believe it. Here was this giant new sanctuary filled with my little music being pushed by 1.21 Gigawatts!!!! Eric said that one of the bass speaker cabinets was 8'X8'. And I said, yeah I saw that speaker in Back to the Future when Michael J. Fox thought he was a rock star and then blew himself across the room! What a moment.
Then we went to Zio's for Italian food. Good, cheap, and lots of it. After we were stuffed with food I took them to the ice skating rink. At which they started complaining of sore feet and ankles only ten minutes into the hour session. I can't razz the too hard because I didn't even skate (the last time I went ice skating I pulled one of those gross football replay moments where the guy goes one way and his knee/ankle go another... and the tv station keeps showing it over and over....anyway, I wasn't getting back on the ice) but still 10 minutes! Come on, they're in high school and made out of rubber still. They ought to be able bounce around the ice even if they can't skate. We had fun a lot of fun.
But wait, there's more. We went to a coffee shop to see my friends (Chad, Becky, and James) who are in this band called Given (I'd give you there website, but they don't have one). Well it was a bust because the coffee house double booked some other guy for the same night. Well, we went home in defeat thinking that we weren't going to get our music fill for the evening. When we got back to the church the guys started playing in our worship room. LSS, An hour later we had two new songs that are unbelievable. What does this mean?! What are we going to do with all these awesome songs. We'll see.
That's it for today. I hope all is well and write me when you get a chance.
Thanks,
jb
PS. And for you non-junior-high note writers LSS=Long Story Short.
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Sunday, February 22, 2004 5:40 PM
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Sunday, February 22, 2004 5:40 PM
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WOW! Check out my amazing photo lab. Thad really did great work here. He got the format from imageVue, but was great in cutomizing it for my site and getting it up and running. They'll be more organized soon, but for now there is a lot to look at. Email any questions if you have some, but I'll be writing descriptions and explainations for each one shortly.
see ya,
jb
see ya,
jb
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Thursday, February 19, 2004 10:58 AM
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Thursday, February 19, 2004 10:58 AM
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This picture killed me this morning. Pretty Great!
I'm in the office cranking away on this project. Spring is on the way and I'm pretty excited about it. It's been a long and cold winter.
Ready for the HEAT!
jb
I'm in the office cranking away on this project. Spring is on the way and I'm pretty excited about it. It's been a long and cold winter.
Ready for the HEAT!
jb
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Tuesday, February 17, 2004 3:27 PM
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Tuesday, February 17, 2004 3:27 PM
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Please Listen to this song by Pedro The Lion. Everyone should hear it!
http://suicidesqueeze.net/mp3/ptl-letter.mp3
"Change the truth to accommodate the Brilliance of men"
jb
http://suicidesqueeze.net/mp3/ptl-letter.mp3
"Change the truth to accommodate the Brilliance of men"
jb
This is my bro Ross Lalli on the top of the mountain in Red River, NM. I wish that I was there today!
Hi. I'm here in the office staring at the screen trying hard to be productive and failing miserably. Why is it that some days you can produce like crazy and others it seems hopeless. In the past I've just kind of given up on these days thinking it was better just to give it a go when I was more productive. But lately, I've been thinking that I'd like to figure out a way to press on and sort of beat these days at their own game. Is there some trick or mind game that I can play on myself to get me moving and producing? Does the answer lie in just pressing on and fighting through it? I KNOW that I've had plenty enough coffee today... so it can't be that.
I hate this feeling too. The one where you feel like you're in trouble (or about to be if you don't get with it and get it finished). That is not making things any better. I find myself just looking through band websites on the net. I spent probably and hour reading Adam duritz' weblog on the counting crows site. What makes that stuff interesting to me? It seems weird for me to waste time reading his ramblings, but then again I'm turning around and writing my own ramblings about reading his ramblings... What a life we've carved out for ourselves!
I was talking last night to a couple of my friends (Dave and jeanie) about this tear between the pros and cons of living unstructured and artistically creative (ie staying up late... writing, everyday being different and unexpected) compared to living a steady and consistent life (ie getting up early everymorning/exercising/getting into the office on-time/dependable/ 8 to 5/etc...). I've been living the first for so long now that it seems impossible to switch to the second and the best example I can think for that is days like today (slow... not getting anything done...). I normally would just jet to see what will work today.
maybe everyone has these days or a regular basis and I just need to deal with it. or maybe I just can't be content with where I'm at. In 1 john 4:11 it says that 'I've learned that whatever state I'm in therein to be content'. So I guess I need to be. I sure don't feel like it today.
jb
I hate this feeling too. The one where you feel like you're in trouble (or about to be if you don't get with it and get it finished). That is not making things any better. I find myself just looking through band websites on the net. I spent probably and hour reading Adam duritz' weblog on the counting crows site. What makes that stuff interesting to me? It seems weird for me to waste time reading his ramblings, but then again I'm turning around and writing my own ramblings about reading his ramblings... What a life we've carved out for ourselves!
I was talking last night to a couple of my friends (Dave and jeanie) about this tear between the pros and cons of living unstructured and artistically creative (ie staying up late... writing, everyday being different and unexpected) compared to living a steady and consistent life (ie getting up early everymorning/exercising/getting into the office on-time/dependable/ 8 to 5/etc...). I've been living the first for so long now that it seems impossible to switch to the second and the best example I can think for that is days like today (slow... not getting anything done...). I normally would just jet to see what will work today.
maybe everyone has these days or a regular basis and I just need to deal with it. or maybe I just can't be content with where I'm at. In 1 john 4:11 it says that 'I've learned that whatever state I'm in therein to be content'. So I guess I need to be. I sure don't feel like it today.
jb
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Sunday, February 15, 2004 6:24 PM
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Sunday, February 15, 2004 6:24 PM
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"Ghandi on percussion, Martin Luther King on Bass, Guitar would be Isaac Newton, Keyboards Beethoven, Vocals J[esus] C[hrist]."
-- Edge, 2001, describing his "dream band"
-- Edge, 2001, describing his "dream band"
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Friday, February 13, 2004 11:15 AM
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Friday, February 13, 2004 11:15 AM
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So my life as a procrastinator is going by the wayside. It's been a long and checkered road that has left me with some bad habits and in a few tough ruts. However, I'm told that it IS possible for one to work their way out of this web of last-minute mentality. So with great faith and motivation I'm embarking on a change in lifestyle that is sure to be painful in the beginning. So to my friends who know me as jason "last-minute" brown I must bid you farewell, for the new Jason "has it together, dependable, responsible.....(ie. adult)" Brown is on the way. I hope for your support and encouragement as I venture into new territories of consistency and steadiness. It is long overdue and I think that most of you have known that for a while, you've just been too nice to bring it to my attention in a way that would actually get my attention. Thanks for the politeness... now I'm asking you to be rude. I'm sure that this thing has crept up in areas of my life that are hard to see from my perspective, so some help would be appreciated.
Justifications I used in the past to procrastinate:
1.) I always got away with it (I thought).
This means that I would always get the assignment/project/etc... in on time because I've always been able to work very quickly. This perpetuated the problem by making me think that "as long as I get it in.... who cares if it is last minute". Without any visible consequences, it seemed like "no harm...no foul".
2.) There was probably always some amount of non-violent protest of the corporate world and my twisted and arrogant thinking was by putting things off until the last minute and still getting them in on time, it showed that people shouldn't have to be measured (at work) by the amount of time that they are there, but rather by the amount of work that they get done. I liked to think that I could do 40 hours worth of regular work in about 4-6 hours. EGO, EGO, EGO.... when will it let me go?!
3.) Let's just be honest.... LAZINESS! This is one of those bad habits that is inevitable when you procrastinate....(do nothing for a long time... and then do a lot in a short amount of time).
Reasons for Getting it together. (Infinite!...but I'll point out a couple)
1.) I've finally realized that my life and the things I do have impact on those around me. Invariably, when I've put something off and have to really get with it to get it finished that is the same time when someone needs my help or has something going on in their life that they want me to be a part of. This forces me to choose, and because of my procrastination I've got no choice.... because I've put off whatever it is and HAVE to do it then. This is a consequence of selfishness that you don't see if you are always looking and focused on just yourself (like I've been).
2.) I've been thinking a lot lately about being a good steward of what God gives you. How can we expect him to give us more if we don't appreciate/take care of what he has given us (ie how can I expect a new car, if I don't take care of the used one that I have now; same with the house I'm living in, money I've been given, job I have, etc....). This is also true with time and our bodies. We need to make sure that both (and everything we say and do) bring glory to God. Me wasting time/procrastinating doesn't bring glory to God, and then when he needs me to help someone and I can't because I've got work to do (that I've put off), that doesn't bring glory to him either. Likewise, he has given me a temple for worship to him (my body), and it is my job to keep that house in order (with appearance, actions, etc.) so that it brings glory to His name. Laziness is sort of the antithesis of that effort. So my quest to be a good steward has been extended to my body and time.
I know that you all care about me and that is why I'm letting you know what's going down on the homefront. I also want to apologize for the pain/inconvenience/disappointment/(and all the things that I'm forgetting) that this selfishness in me has cause you over the years. I thank you for your patience and love and forgiveness.
Thank You and God Bless You!
Jason
Justifications I used in the past to procrastinate:
1.) I always got away with it (I thought).
This means that I would always get the assignment/project/etc... in on time because I've always been able to work very quickly. This perpetuated the problem by making me think that "as long as I get it in.... who cares if it is last minute". Without any visible consequences, it seemed like "no harm...no foul".
2.) There was probably always some amount of non-violent protest of the corporate world and my twisted and arrogant thinking was by putting things off until the last minute and still getting them in on time, it showed that people shouldn't have to be measured (at work) by the amount of time that they are there, but rather by the amount of work that they get done. I liked to think that I could do 40 hours worth of regular work in about 4-6 hours. EGO, EGO, EGO.... when will it let me go?!
3.) Let's just be honest.... LAZINESS! This is one of those bad habits that is inevitable when you procrastinate....(do nothing for a long time... and then do a lot in a short amount of time).
Reasons for Getting it together. (Infinite!...but I'll point out a couple)
1.) I've finally realized that my life and the things I do have impact on those around me. Invariably, when I've put something off and have to really get with it to get it finished that is the same time when someone needs my help or has something going on in their life that they want me to be a part of. This forces me to choose, and because of my procrastination I've got no choice.... because I've put off whatever it is and HAVE to do it then. This is a consequence of selfishness that you don't see if you are always looking and focused on just yourself (like I've been).
2.) I've been thinking a lot lately about being a good steward of what God gives you. How can we expect him to give us more if we don't appreciate/take care of what he has given us (ie how can I expect a new car, if I don't take care of the used one that I have now; same with the house I'm living in, money I've been given, job I have, etc....). This is also true with time and our bodies. We need to make sure that both (and everything we say and do) bring glory to God. Me wasting time/procrastinating doesn't bring glory to God, and then when he needs me to help someone and I can't because I've got work to do (that I've put off), that doesn't bring glory to him either. Likewise, he has given me a temple for worship to him (my body), and it is my job to keep that house in order (with appearance, actions, etc.) so that it brings glory to His name. Laziness is sort of the antithesis of that effort. So my quest to be a good steward has been extended to my body and time.
I know that you all care about me and that is why I'm letting you know what's going down on the homefront. I also want to apologize for the pain/inconvenience/disappointment/(and all the things that I'm forgetting) that this selfishness in me has cause you over the years. I thank you for your patience and love and forgiveness.
Thank You and God Bless You!
Jason
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Thursday, February 12, 2004 12:48 PM
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Thursday, February 12, 2004 12:48 PM
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Dan Milford and I had a great discussion yesterday about the issues and styles of worship. Specifically, the similarities/differences of tradional and contemporary styles of worship. We're trying to understand the motives and needs behind the desire of people to prefer one or the other. It is an issue that has plagued churches in recent years. Typically it is generational (preferences in different types of music), but this is not always the case. We've seen these differences manifest in criticism and alienation of certain people or groups within the church. This can, if unanswered, lead to frustration and even cause some to change churches or worse.... to stop going to church at all.
Dan emailed me the following list of things that I think are helpful in looking at each groups perspective.
First is list of a few things that some might look for in a worship service.
Worship
Desire to enter a space that is quiet, ordered, clean, rooted, holy set apart from the loud, chaotic, sin-filled, root-less world where we live.
Desire for a service that is predictably the same throughout the years, being significantly the same as the worship of the community where I first experienced God's grace.
Desire for worship to engage the mind and recognize the difficulty of making faithful decisions in the world in which I live.
Desire for a freedom to respond in the privacy of my heart, mind, and soul and through the strength of my actions.
I prefer music that allows me to reaffirm the good news of God's grace through history and in our lives (i.e. O God, Our Help In Ages Past or Amazing Grace)
The presence of the community reminds me that I am not alone in this journey of faith. We worship God as a community that God has brought together and created into one body.
Next is a list of some things that might be important to another group.
Desire to enter a space that is energetic, spontaneous, new. To have faith be able to communicate in the same language and on the same level as my world runs.
Desire for a service that makes room for the unexpected and that changes to reflect the communication styles of the times (using the latest Bible translations, music, spoken and visual communication styles, etc.).
Desire for worship to engage the heart, simply, confidently and powerfully helping me experience the presence of God.
I anticipate the movement of the Spirit to move my heart in ways that result in public responses. I want to be able to express my emotions in worship freely.
I prefer music that allows me to sing praise to God for his glory, his character, his salvation of me.
The presence of the community helps me to let go, feel God's presence deeply, and they help me to worship God as though one on one.
Dan also had a few ideas about some of the essentials of the worship service.
Some Things To Address or To Do in Worship:
Teaching (Doctrinal, Biblical, practical Christian living, etc.), Proclaiming Truth
Sacraments (Baptism/Affirmation of Faith, Communion)
Counseling/Giving voice to people's deepest emotions, concerns, needs, etc.
(Joy, Lament, Guilt/Confession, Anger, Grief, Need to be forgiven & offer forgiveness, etc.
Inviting, Directing, Encouraging, etc.
Confronting, Exhorting, Challenging, etc.
Celebrating the Christian year (Advent, Christmas, Lent, Easter, Pentecost, etc.),
Celebrating God's gifts to our community, leaders ordained/commissioned, ministries done, etc.
Where is the balance? Should you mix styles (sometimes just making everyone unhappy)? Should we all just grow up and praise God? Should we work on education between the generations so that it is less about their music and more about OUR (as in everyone) music? Well, that is what we're trying to figure out. When you're designing services, meeting times, music, etc... you want to make sure that you are reaching everyone (or at least making your best effort to reach everyone).
Any thoughts?
See ya,
Jason
Dan emailed me the following list of things that I think are helpful in looking at each groups perspective.
First is list of a few things that some might look for in a worship service.
Worship
Desire to enter a space that is quiet, ordered, clean, rooted, holy set apart from the loud, chaotic, sin-filled, root-less world where we live.
Desire for a service that is predictably the same throughout the years, being significantly the same as the worship of the community where I first experienced God's grace.
Desire for worship to engage the mind and recognize the difficulty of making faithful decisions in the world in which I live.
Desire for a freedom to respond in the privacy of my heart, mind, and soul and through the strength of my actions.
I prefer music that allows me to reaffirm the good news of God's grace through history and in our lives (i.e. O God, Our Help In Ages Past or Amazing Grace)
The presence of the community reminds me that I am not alone in this journey of faith. We worship God as a community that God has brought together and created into one body.
Next is a list of some things that might be important to another group.
Desire to enter a space that is energetic, spontaneous, new. To have faith be able to communicate in the same language and on the same level as my world runs.
Desire for a service that makes room for the unexpected and that changes to reflect the communication styles of the times (using the latest Bible translations, music, spoken and visual communication styles, etc.).
Desire for worship to engage the heart, simply, confidently and powerfully helping me experience the presence of God.
I anticipate the movement of the Spirit to move my heart in ways that result in public responses. I want to be able to express my emotions in worship freely.
I prefer music that allows me to sing praise to God for his glory, his character, his salvation of me.
The presence of the community helps me to let go, feel God's presence deeply, and they help me to worship God as though one on one.
Dan also had a few ideas about some of the essentials of the worship service.
Some Things To Address or To Do in Worship:
Teaching (Doctrinal, Biblical, practical Christian living, etc.), Proclaiming Truth
Sacraments (Baptism/Affirmation of Faith, Communion)
Counseling/Giving voice to people's deepest emotions, concerns, needs, etc.
(Joy, Lament, Guilt/Confession, Anger, Grief, Need to be forgiven & offer forgiveness, etc.
Inviting, Directing, Encouraging, etc.
Confronting, Exhorting, Challenging, etc.
Celebrating the Christian year (Advent, Christmas, Lent, Easter, Pentecost, etc.),
Celebrating God's gifts to our community, leaders ordained/commissioned, ministries done, etc.
Where is the balance? Should you mix styles (sometimes just making everyone unhappy)? Should we all just grow up and praise God? Should we work on education between the generations so that it is less about their music and more about OUR (as in everyone) music? Well, that is what we're trying to figure out. When you're designing services, meeting times, music, etc... you want to make sure that you are reaching everyone (or at least making your best effort to reach everyone).
Any thoughts?
See ya,
Jason
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Sunday, February 08, 2004 1:29 PM
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Sunday, February 08, 2004 1:29 PM
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It is freezing here in Tulsa. I'm supposed to be cooking a dessert for our church's dessert auction this afternoon. I was thinking about cookie dough (straight from the plastic tube). Let's face it.... this is probably not only the most tasty think I could come up with, but also the most safe for potential consumers. How much do you think that it would go for on the auction block. We are raising money for youth camp, so hopefully people won't be too harsh, but I'm sure that they are expecting more effort. I'll keep you posted.
Dan Milford (who pastors the church that I go to) talked this morning about overconsumption. He talked about the differences between the generations that went through the great depression and the ones who have for the most part, only experienced abundance. Excess can unknowingly lead to overconsumption. I know that this is true with me. If i'm honest, convienance is much more of a decision maker than cost or practicality. However, this morning Dan illustrated the point that if the whole world lived to American standards of consumption, it would take 6 earths to supply us all. This is crazy, and it is plain to see.... unbalanced in every way (physically, spiritually, etc).
I know that there are always stats flying around about Americans and the rest of the world, and most of them are so disproportionate that we've grown a little jaded to them. One reason is that we don't feel like we made the problem, and that it is too big to sufficiently change,.... so what's the point. The other is the fact that if we really dwell on it... (ie. look at the photographs, study hunger reports, and realize the health and poverty crisis) we will just be overwhelmed with unhealthy guilt and spiritual depression.
I've chewed on these issues for quite a while now, but today I saw a glimpse of light that I believe to be wisdom (ie. Truth). James chapter 3 says that true wisdom comes from above and it is first pure and peaceable, gentle, and full of mercy. I feel like today I had a baby-steps kind of realization that all I can do is Love God with all my heart and love my neighbor as myself. When I think about the amount I consume, it is obvious that I need to cut back, and so I can work on that with great ferocity. Which is being a good stewart of the things that God has given me.... not being wasteful (ie. Loving God). When I think about my neighbor, I realize that I can pray always for God to move speedily on their behalf to meet their needs in his perfect will, and that if my life can be of any use in that process for Him to please use me for His good work. I have to trust that if I shape my life around His Word and direction, then he will use me in great ways (even when I don't even know I'm being used). To encourage someone, donate to feed the hungry, receive the call for mission work here and abroad, and generally be a good stewart to the resources that He gives. You just never know where that will lead.
I'm reminded and inspired by a couple of guys who also started from humble beginnings and keep directing praise to God.
KEEP GOING! KEEP GOING!
Be Gods,
Jason
Dan Milford (who pastors the church that I go to) talked this morning about overconsumption. He talked about the differences between the generations that went through the great depression and the ones who have for the most part, only experienced abundance. Excess can unknowingly lead to overconsumption. I know that this is true with me. If i'm honest, convienance is much more of a decision maker than cost or practicality. However, this morning Dan illustrated the point that if the whole world lived to American standards of consumption, it would take 6 earths to supply us all. This is crazy, and it is plain to see.... unbalanced in every way (physically, spiritually, etc).
I know that there are always stats flying around about Americans and the rest of the world, and most of them are so disproportionate that we've grown a little jaded to them. One reason is that we don't feel like we made the problem, and that it is too big to sufficiently change,.... so what's the point. The other is the fact that if we really dwell on it... (ie. look at the photographs, study hunger reports, and realize the health and poverty crisis) we will just be overwhelmed with unhealthy guilt and spiritual depression.
I've chewed on these issues for quite a while now, but today I saw a glimpse of light that I believe to be wisdom (ie. Truth). James chapter 3 says that true wisdom comes from above and it is first pure and peaceable, gentle, and full of mercy. I feel like today I had a baby-steps kind of realization that all I can do is Love God with all my heart and love my neighbor as myself. When I think about the amount I consume, it is obvious that I need to cut back, and so I can work on that with great ferocity. Which is being a good stewart of the things that God has given me.... not being wasteful (ie. Loving God). When I think about my neighbor, I realize that I can pray always for God to move speedily on their behalf to meet their needs in his perfect will, and that if my life can be of any use in that process for Him to please use me for His good work. I have to trust that if I shape my life around His Word and direction, then he will use me in great ways (even when I don't even know I'm being used). To encourage someone, donate to feed the hungry, receive the call for mission work here and abroad, and generally be a good stewart to the resources that He gives. You just never know where that will lead.
I'm reminded and inspired by a couple of guys who also started from humble beginnings and keep directing praise to God.
KEEP GOING! KEEP GOING!
Be Gods,
Jason
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Friday, February 06, 2004 10:48 AM
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Friday, February 06, 2004 10:48 AM
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So it is Friday, which means jeans day at work combined with big sweatshirts to fight off the cold, and generally a laid-back attitude. I had a couple of really interesting experiences in the past couple of days. First of all, I got this months gas bill.... $254! Unbelievable! But all week I've been thinking about a couple of friends that I haven't seen or spoken to in almost a year.
The first is a guy named Lester Sumrall who is the grandson of the television minister who founded LeSEA Broadcasting that reaches the entire world. Anyway, Lester is a neat guy and happily married with a couple of children. I haven't seen him in quite a while, but started thinking about him this week, and wanted to try and contact him to catch up. Last night, however, I was with some friends at Nordaggio's (a local coffee house) and in walks Lester. Totally out of the blue.
Secondly, I've been thinking about some dear friends of mine in Philadelphia, Rick and Jen Mellor who are originally from Sand Springs, Ok. I went to high school with them. They are both very intelligent and whole lot of fun to be around. They share my affinity for globe trotting (to see some amazing photographs from their travels around the world go to www.jen-rick.com ). Anyway, I haven't talked to them in almost a year, and was thinking about giving them a call this week, when this morning I checked my email and found a letter from Jen. She's about to go to London for her work for a couple of weeks, and Rick will visit for Valentine's Day. Whoa!
So is this just coincidence? Premonitions? Anyway, very interesting at any rate.
I know this was a bit of a strange blog, but it's been a bit of a strange day.
Have a great weekend!
Jason
The first is a guy named Lester Sumrall who is the grandson of the television minister who founded LeSEA Broadcasting that reaches the entire world. Anyway, Lester is a neat guy and happily married with a couple of children. I haven't seen him in quite a while, but started thinking about him this week, and wanted to try and contact him to catch up. Last night, however, I was with some friends at Nordaggio's (a local coffee house) and in walks Lester. Totally out of the blue.
Secondly, I've been thinking about some dear friends of mine in Philadelphia, Rick and Jen Mellor who are originally from Sand Springs, Ok. I went to high school with them. They are both very intelligent and whole lot of fun to be around. They share my affinity for globe trotting (to see some amazing photographs from their travels around the world go to www.jen-rick.com ). Anyway, I haven't talked to them in almost a year, and was thinking about giving them a call this week, when this morning I checked my email and found a letter from Jen. She's about to go to London for her work for a couple of weeks, and Rick will visit for Valentine's Day. Whoa!
So is this just coincidence? Premonitions? Anyway, very interesting at any rate.
I know this was a bit of a strange blog, but it's been a bit of a strange day.
Have a great weekend!
Jason
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Wednesday, February 04, 2004 3:08 PM
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Wednesday, February 04, 2004 3:08 PM
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I recently took a trip to Notre Dame. It started in a whirlwind (watched Rudy on a friday afternoon, started missing the land of the Irish, and a few hours later was in my suv with my bro Nathan heading for South Bend), and ended having an impact on me that I'm sure will last a long time. The conversations, the new friends that I made, the magic of the grotto under a fresh blanket of snow, and of course the folk choir channeling angelic voices from On High in the Basilica were all amazing and even overwhelming.
for pics of the trip go to
http://www.personal.utulsa.edu/~nathan-griffis/pictures.htm
One young lady I met was most impressive. Her name is Nicole Shirilla and she works with campus ministry at Notre Dame. Nicole has been able to do work in Africa on two occasions within the past year. The first trip to Rwanda and the second was recently to a conference in Nigeria. She worked with the Catholic Relief Services and did quite a bit of filming to bring back images of her time there. She shared some of the edited footage with us which just fueled a great conversation. It was personally inspiring to hear some of the stories of the lives that these people live. Anyway, I wanted to share with you a couple of her emails that will give you a sense of the work that she, CRS, and Notre Dame are doing in Africa.
This first letter is while Nicole was in Rwanda on September 14.
hello everyone! or muraho as they say here. know that you are all in my thoughts
and prayers as this journey continues. i have already seen enough to fill a book,
and i've only been in the country less than 24 hours. i was able to get to a
computer at the place i am staying today-- right now were in kigali which is the
capital-- tomorrow well be splitting up into groups of two to spend the week in
four different parishes throughout the country. im heading to kinazi-- its about
two hours from kigali, and what i know right now is that the area was greatly
affected by the genocide, and is home to an orphanage, two prisons, a secondary
school, no electricity, and a parish that is very much looking forward to our time
wth them.
this experience has already impacted me more than i ever realized it could. today
we began our day at mass-- st; michael's is the cathedral here, and the church
structure is basically an outdoor pavilion church with seats. i mention that only
because it challenged my notion of 'cathedral' as i realized that a church really
isn't just the name for the building, but for the people inside of it. the priest gave
the most inspiring homily-- the feast of the exaltation of the
holy cross-- and hearing the Gospel proclaimed and reflected on in a
3rd world country is more humbling than i can even put
into words. perhaps even more humbling was the crowd of children who
surrounded our group after mass, begging for money. 'cent franc, chop chop' they
would say. their way of asking for 100 francs- the money here- to have
something to eat. one boy stared right in my eyes as our van drove away, and as
i wondered how the world can be so unbalanced, and what the Gospel we had just
heard had to do with the answer to that question.
one thing that really touched me at mass... at the consecrating when the priest
lifted the host and said 'take and eat, for this is My body given up for you'
EVERYONE CLAPPED. it was so beautiful-- they were truly so thankful for Christ's
sacrifice and for the eucharist, they burst into applause. can you imagine the
sound of that?
there are already a thousand more stories, but here is one more. one of our
leaders and CRS staff member here is gloriosa. she is a rwandan woman who
survived the genocide, but lost both of her parents, and many others as well. she
had the chance to study at the kroc peace institute at nd last summer, and today
at lunch she told me about her experience at the grotto, and how she sat there
for three hours looking at the candles, and thinking of her parents, and all those
who were killed. but she said that instead of the crosses or tomb stones that
represent the dead at memorials here in rwanda, the candels were a great sign of
hope for her. she told me how over the three hours, she kept going back to light
more candles, as she remembered those she had lost. she said it was only the
second time since the genocide that she was able to think of it with a feeling of
comfort. the first was in a dream she had of her parents, when they assured her
that they were happy, and in no more harm...
gloriosa is also thinking of applying to study again at nd for her masters in int'l
peace studies. she is worried that she has only finished 3 and a half years of
college, and did not officially finish college. she didn't get to finish because of the
genocide, and since then has spent her time with crs working to restore peace,
confronting the scars of the past, and to work to make sure that it never
happens again, as she said to me today.
the poverty here is nothing i can put into words. i am seeing with my own eyes
things that i've heard about, or seen on tv, but never really could comprehend. it
is all very real. but also real is the
hope that people have, and the pride that they take in their country. gloriosa told
me that she cannot leave rwanda... she knows that she has a mission here, and i
promise you that she is a living saint and the truest model of faith and courage
that i ever have met. and you should see her eyes glow when she talks about the
grotto...
so those of you at nd, if you have a chance to stop by there and light a candle for
her, i know she would be very grateful.
you are all in my prayers, and i send my love from this country that still has much
more to teach me. i will see you all soon, and until then may God hold you in the
palm of His hand--
love always,
nicole
nshirill@nd.edu
This second letter is from a couple of days ago and dicusses her experiecne from the Nigerian conference.
Hi everyone!
Thanks so much for all of your thoughts and prayers during the trip to Nigeria. On Wednesday the ND student newspaper is going to run a four page section on the conference, for which many of us contributed articles. I just wanted to share my contribution with all of you, because many of you have asked how the trip has been, but I sometimes feel like I'm not quite able to get it into words! I really appreciate all of your support though, and I hope this gives a little bit of insight into what we learned on our trip.
God bless you always!!
love,
nicole
“The answer is always in the entire story, not a piece of it.”
-Jim Harrison
A Parable for Our Times
Sometimes a simple story can make the most complex situation surprisingly clear. At the conference it was Sylvia Bawa, a bright college senior from Ghana, who captured a central truth of the work for solidarity in the telling of an African story of a great flood that fell on the animal kingdom. In her words:
“Unaffected by the flood, the monkeys were happily jumping about in the treetops when they noticed the fish ‘trapped’ down in the waters. Deciding to save the fish, the monkeys climbed down, picked them up and placed them on dry land. Seeing the fish jump about, the monkeys thought they had done a great thing, and that the fish were happy to be saved. In a few minutes, though, the fish lay motionless. Surprised, the monkeys said, ‘These people must be very, very ungrateful. For all we have done to save them, they cannot even utter a word of thank you.’”
Walter Cronkite once said, “In seeking truth you have to get both sides of a story.” Build on the solidification of right relationships, solidarity is a dynamic process of exchange allowing for the expansion of both the mind and the heart. Experiencing the culture and reality of another is the beginning point, the foundation of knowing truth. This recognition of truth builds constructive dialogue, and constructive dialogue becomes the foundation of solidarity itself. Whether speaking of the person in the next room or the next continent, one must be willing to open themselves up – even if only in their imagination - to the reality of another if lasting solidarity it is to built.
As Bawa explained, “An analogy can be drawn between this story of the monkeys and some of the help poor countries receive from the outside, and even of our projects in the church, if we do not know well who we are trying to save… Indeed everybody, even the poor and the neglected, are experts in their own personal situations, and it is important that you consult them when you are trying to offer them any particular type of help,” for, “it is in the culture that you find the most cherished goals of the people.” Indeed, what is development, except the advancement of the people towards their most cherished goals? Outside help in this effort must never forget this fact.
The United States and Africa have long been connected. The past has already written a story that cannot be forgotten in the present work for solidarity, As Bawa explained, it was “those who had the potential of developing Africa” who were taken away in the slave trade. She also remarked that, “It is interesting that Christianity had to be introduced alongside a cruel thing as slavery.” She told of a region in Ghana where “the dungeon where the slaves were held was directly below the church, and while people were suffering and dying below, prayers were being offered to God above. And I guess Jesus would have said, ‘Forgive them Father, for indeed they know not what they are doing.’” Yet Bawa did not recount these facts to dwell on the past. In fact, she stated with conviction, “We cannot rewrite history. I think that our responsibility is to safeguard what is to come, and to make our own history using the past as a guide.”
It is true that our world is often a complex place. In order to establish justice and build solidarity, we must often confront histories and current situations that can be overwhelming and confusing. And yet, there remains a story to guide us. The story of the Cross. In Sylvia’s words, “By dying on the cross, Jesus Himself established solidarity for us. He removed all barriers to heaven, and … with a little bit of sacrifice we can do the same.”
A Native American proverb tells us, “It takes a thousand voices to tell a single story.” The voices we heard at the conference, representing the millions that have gone unheard in Africa, combined to tell us a story that, like Christ’s, ends with hope. And as the conference ended the words of Kathryn Hoomkwap burned in our hearts, “Don’t be discouraged. Don’t be afraid. It started with twelve. It started in Jerusalem with twelve. And in this century, 2004, we’ve had the work of twelve people been propagated to the ends of the world.”
What started with twelve continues now with us. It is our world, our faith, our mission for solidarity to embrace. Indeed, this is our story to tell. Let us not be afraid of proclaiming it with our lives unto the end of the earth.
Thank you for your work Nicole!
God Bless,
Jason
for pics of the trip go to
http://www.personal.utulsa.edu/~nathan-griffis/pictures.htm
One young lady I met was most impressive. Her name is Nicole Shirilla and she works with campus ministry at Notre Dame. Nicole has been able to do work in Africa on two occasions within the past year. The first trip to Rwanda and the second was recently to a conference in Nigeria. She worked with the Catholic Relief Services and did quite a bit of filming to bring back images of her time there. She shared some of the edited footage with us which just fueled a great conversation. It was personally inspiring to hear some of the stories of the lives that these people live. Anyway, I wanted to share with you a couple of her emails that will give you a sense of the work that she, CRS, and Notre Dame are doing in Africa.
This first letter is while Nicole was in Rwanda on September 14.
hello everyone! or muraho as they say here. know that you are all in my thoughts
and prayers as this journey continues. i have already seen enough to fill a book,
and i've only been in the country less than 24 hours. i was able to get to a
computer at the place i am staying today-- right now were in kigali which is the
capital-- tomorrow well be splitting up into groups of two to spend the week in
four different parishes throughout the country. im heading to kinazi-- its about
two hours from kigali, and what i know right now is that the area was greatly
affected by the genocide, and is home to an orphanage, two prisons, a secondary
school, no electricity, and a parish that is very much looking forward to our time
wth them.
this experience has already impacted me more than i ever realized it could. today
we began our day at mass-- st; michael's is the cathedral here, and the church
structure is basically an outdoor pavilion church with seats. i mention that only
because it challenged my notion of 'cathedral' as i realized that a church really
isn't just the name for the building, but for the people inside of it. the priest gave
the most inspiring homily-- the feast of the exaltation of the
holy cross-- and hearing the Gospel proclaimed and reflected on in a
3rd world country is more humbling than i can even put
into words. perhaps even more humbling was the crowd of children who
surrounded our group after mass, begging for money. 'cent franc, chop chop' they
would say. their way of asking for 100 francs- the money here- to have
something to eat. one boy stared right in my eyes as our van drove away, and as
i wondered how the world can be so unbalanced, and what the Gospel we had just
heard had to do with the answer to that question.
one thing that really touched me at mass... at the consecrating when the priest
lifted the host and said 'take and eat, for this is My body given up for you'
EVERYONE CLAPPED. it was so beautiful-- they were truly so thankful for Christ's
sacrifice and for the eucharist, they burst into applause. can you imagine the
sound of that?
there are already a thousand more stories, but here is one more. one of our
leaders and CRS staff member here is gloriosa. she is a rwandan woman who
survived the genocide, but lost both of her parents, and many others as well. she
had the chance to study at the kroc peace institute at nd last summer, and today
at lunch she told me about her experience at the grotto, and how she sat there
for three hours looking at the candles, and thinking of her parents, and all those
who were killed. but she said that instead of the crosses or tomb stones that
represent the dead at memorials here in rwanda, the candels were a great sign of
hope for her. she told me how over the three hours, she kept going back to light
more candles, as she remembered those she had lost. she said it was only the
second time since the genocide that she was able to think of it with a feeling of
comfort. the first was in a dream she had of her parents, when they assured her
that they were happy, and in no more harm...
gloriosa is also thinking of applying to study again at nd for her masters in int'l
peace studies. she is worried that she has only finished 3 and a half years of
college, and did not officially finish college. she didn't get to finish because of the
genocide, and since then has spent her time with crs working to restore peace,
confronting the scars of the past, and to work to make sure that it never
happens again, as she said to me today.
the poverty here is nothing i can put into words. i am seeing with my own eyes
things that i've heard about, or seen on tv, but never really could comprehend. it
is all very real. but also real is the
hope that people have, and the pride that they take in their country. gloriosa told
me that she cannot leave rwanda... she knows that she has a mission here, and i
promise you that she is a living saint and the truest model of faith and courage
that i ever have met. and you should see her eyes glow when she talks about the
grotto...
so those of you at nd, if you have a chance to stop by there and light a candle for
her, i know she would be very grateful.
you are all in my prayers, and i send my love from this country that still has much
more to teach me. i will see you all soon, and until then may God hold you in the
palm of His hand--
love always,
nicole
nshirill@nd.edu
This second letter is from a couple of days ago and dicusses her experiecne from the Nigerian conference.
Hi everyone!
Thanks so much for all of your thoughts and prayers during the trip to Nigeria. On Wednesday the ND student newspaper is going to run a four page section on the conference, for which many of us contributed articles. I just wanted to share my contribution with all of you, because many of you have asked how the trip has been, but I sometimes feel like I'm not quite able to get it into words! I really appreciate all of your support though, and I hope this gives a little bit of insight into what we learned on our trip.
God bless you always!!
love,
nicole
“The answer is always in the entire story, not a piece of it.”
-Jim Harrison
A Parable for Our Times
Sometimes a simple story can make the most complex situation surprisingly clear. At the conference it was Sylvia Bawa, a bright college senior from Ghana, who captured a central truth of the work for solidarity in the telling of an African story of a great flood that fell on the animal kingdom. In her words:
“Unaffected by the flood, the monkeys were happily jumping about in the treetops when they noticed the fish ‘trapped’ down in the waters. Deciding to save the fish, the monkeys climbed down, picked them up and placed them on dry land. Seeing the fish jump about, the monkeys thought they had done a great thing, and that the fish were happy to be saved. In a few minutes, though, the fish lay motionless. Surprised, the monkeys said, ‘These people must be very, very ungrateful. For all we have done to save them, they cannot even utter a word of thank you.’”
Walter Cronkite once said, “In seeking truth you have to get both sides of a story.” Build on the solidification of right relationships, solidarity is a dynamic process of exchange allowing for the expansion of both the mind and the heart. Experiencing the culture and reality of another is the beginning point, the foundation of knowing truth. This recognition of truth builds constructive dialogue, and constructive dialogue becomes the foundation of solidarity itself. Whether speaking of the person in the next room or the next continent, one must be willing to open themselves up – even if only in their imagination - to the reality of another if lasting solidarity it is to built.
As Bawa explained, “An analogy can be drawn between this story of the monkeys and some of the help poor countries receive from the outside, and even of our projects in the church, if we do not know well who we are trying to save… Indeed everybody, even the poor and the neglected, are experts in their own personal situations, and it is important that you consult them when you are trying to offer them any particular type of help,” for, “it is in the culture that you find the most cherished goals of the people.” Indeed, what is development, except the advancement of the people towards their most cherished goals? Outside help in this effort must never forget this fact.
The United States and Africa have long been connected. The past has already written a story that cannot be forgotten in the present work for solidarity, As Bawa explained, it was “those who had the potential of developing Africa” who were taken away in the slave trade. She also remarked that, “It is interesting that Christianity had to be introduced alongside a cruel thing as slavery.” She told of a region in Ghana where “the dungeon where the slaves were held was directly below the church, and while people were suffering and dying below, prayers were being offered to God above. And I guess Jesus would have said, ‘Forgive them Father, for indeed they know not what they are doing.’” Yet Bawa did not recount these facts to dwell on the past. In fact, she stated with conviction, “We cannot rewrite history. I think that our responsibility is to safeguard what is to come, and to make our own history using the past as a guide.”
It is true that our world is often a complex place. In order to establish justice and build solidarity, we must often confront histories and current situations that can be overwhelming and confusing. And yet, there remains a story to guide us. The story of the Cross. In Sylvia’s words, “By dying on the cross, Jesus Himself established solidarity for us. He removed all barriers to heaven, and … with a little bit of sacrifice we can do the same.”
A Native American proverb tells us, “It takes a thousand voices to tell a single story.” The voices we heard at the conference, representing the millions that have gone unheard in Africa, combined to tell us a story that, like Christ’s, ends with hope. And as the conference ended the words of Kathryn Hoomkwap burned in our hearts, “Don’t be discouraged. Don’t be afraid. It started with twelve. It started in Jerusalem with twelve. And in this century, 2004, we’ve had the work of twelve people been propagated to the ends of the world.”
What started with twelve continues now with us. It is our world, our faith, our mission for solidarity to embrace. Indeed, this is our story to tell. Let us not be afraid of proclaiming it with our lives unto the end of the earth.
Thank you for your work Nicole!
God Bless,
Jason